Beau Monde Magazine about the expert of an escortservice
On June 20th, Beau Monde Magazine published a report on sultry summer nights, in which they discuss how you can improve your sex life. Marike, founder and owner of Society Service high class escortservice, was interviewed for the report. Due to her many years of experience int he escort industry, she is consulted as an expert. The article was published in Dutch but below you can find a (partial) summary in English.
Report sultry summer nights: spice up your sex life
Just between us... Wether you just got together or have been sort of happily married for years, you can always do better. Therefore, a Masterclass of more fun in the bedroom. Go get him/her, tiger!
Beau Monde-expert: 'A confident woman can seduce any man'
Marike van der Velden (34) started an escort agency during her studies Business Administration, when she was only 21 years old. Now, Society Service has turned in to a multi million euro business. She also wrote the book 'Escort Bijbel', which offers a sneak preview in the premier league of seduction. "Insecurities do not belong in the bedroom." As hotshot of the largest escortservice of The Netherlands Marike knows everything about the art of seduction. She teaches us a mini class about the tricks of the trade.
What are people looking for when they make a booking at your escortservice? "The 'girlfriend experience'. Elaborate and sensual sex, with long foreplay. Some clients have special preferences, such as a fetish, experimenting with BDSM (whips, leather, master, slave, etc.) and a threesome. But everyone wants a lover who is confident, who clearly enjoys herself, takes initiative, communicates and is not judgmental about - also less everyday - preferences. The escort does not have to do everything that the client wishes, but always tries to realize the wishes of the client within their own boundaries."
What is the most common bedroom complaint? "That at the beginning of the relationship the frequency was much higher and the sex was much more exciting and fun. It is normal that it is all a bit less, but if a man gets the feeling that his wife just 'wants to get it over with' to do him a favor, he will not enjoy that. Just like you can imagine that after ten years with the same lover, it is less exciting."
Suppose our body is not as tight as ten years ago, is that a turn-off? "Every woman has something she does not like about herself, but these uncertainties do not belong in the bedroom. The more beautiful she feels, the more she will radiate this and the more beautiful her partner will find her. Sensuality begins in the mind and goes way beyond how beautiful someone is. We all know the statement 'beauty lies in the eye of the beholder', or 'beauty is subjective'. What you yourself do not like, someone else can find beautiful. If you ask me, I advise you to emphasize your positive points with the right clothes, lingerie and some make-up and not care too much about what you think can be better. A radiant, confident woman can seduce any man, no matter how saggy her breasts are and how terrible her cellulite is."
Why do people cheat? "First of all, define cheating. In my opinion, that is when one partner does sexual acts with someone who is not his / her partner without the consent of the other partner. Men cheat for the same reason women do: intimacy. That is more than sex; it is attention, respect, interest in and appreciation for each other. As long as both partners make an efford, I do not expect either of them to cheat. How you can achieve this is different for everyone, it is very personal after all. But the concept of 'date night', during which couples go on a date with each other, and only focus on each other - and not the children, work social media, etc. - is a good way to maintain intimacy within the relationship."
Imagine that ours is extremely conservative and unwilling to move ahead. We do need some more action between the sheets... "If your communication is good, you should not come into a situation where you have to 'get your partner to move ahead' If he does not pick up your somewhat subtle remarks, it is time for a more direct approach and just say it as it is. Do you like to be spanked? Then ask for a a spanking during sex. You can not expect your partner to figure out exactly what you want, especially if you have been doing it in a certain way for years. The responsibility to express your wishes lies just as good with you as with him."
You also have many handsome gentlemen in your portfolio. Our interest has been peaked... "That's right. At Society Service, ladies (and sometimes couples) can also book a charming male escort. They are absolutely not booked by unattractive women who otherwise can not find a man, but confident and successful ladies who are done with the disappointments of internet dating and just want to be assured of a wonderful evening, without any fuss. A great male escort not only looks beautiful and stylish, he also knows how to seduce a woman outside and inside the bedroom. And after that fantastic evening or night he goes home and there are no more obligations. 'No strings attached' is important for escorts. No complications, expectations and hassle. That is worth it for many women. Enjoy an evening uncomplicated please will cost you about the same amount as you spend on a beautiful designer bag."
We want to give our sex life a boost. We have some fantasies, but to express them... "Maybe your partner is also having all kinds of fantasies that he does not dare to share. Start with something you dare to have, for example in which set of lingerie he likes to see you, and which you like to wear. Talk about different subjects. You will see that the more you talk about sex, the easier it gets and the more open you can be. Before you know it, you are sitting together on the sofa looking at erotic movies which show your deepest fantasies. In addition, a fantasy does not necessarily have to be executed. Do you fantasize about double penetration with two large endowed men? For some women nice to try, but for most it will remain just a fantasy."
Your husband is dreaming of a threesome, is this cause for concern? "I think that every man dreams of that. It is a common bookingtype at Society Service. Often a man books two bisexual ladies, or a couple invites an escort. After all, not only men, but also many women fantasize about having sex with another woman."
But still... "Do not get upset if your man fantasizes about a threesome, but talk about it. There is probably a solution imaginable in which this fantasy can be incorporated into your sex life, without you going beyond your own boundaries and doing things against your will. Perhaps it will enrich your sex life enough to talk about it from time to time, that can be very exciting. Or to watch erotic films featuring threesomes, or enjoy a tantric couple massage. Or just do it."
How can we get back the amazing sex we had in the beginning of the relationship? "Research toys, experiment with new sex techniques, book a course erotic massage or tantra, shop for the best lingerie... Again, it is about intimacy and communication. To share desires without being condemned. Some have a closet full of toys, while it is already very exciting for the other to experiment with one for the first time. Some couples both have the desire to have sex with another woman, and go for a threesome. It can also be interesting and enriching to visit a luxurious erotic party. There are many misunderstandings about this. Many people think that they are big orgies, but that is not the case. The better erotic parties are stylish, sexy and sensual but not vulgar. You can dance in lingerie, watch and be watched, or go for it and have sex with another couple. For couples up to a year or 45 I would recommend Caviar de la Nuit. Or book a trip through the international organization Eu4ria, where like-minded couples from the age of 40 spend a week together on a sunny destination in Europe. It is equipped with every luxury you may desire and there is a slow build up towards a more a sensual setting. Something very different that is also popular is the 'Escort for a day' where you pretend to be a high class escort for a day. Put on a beautiful, elegant dress with beautiful lingerie and high heels. Let your partner take you out for dinner and let him be the ultimate gentleman who will keep the door open for you, take your coat, give you a glass of champagne and have sex with him as if you were his high class escort."
Could it be something simpler? "Attention can be given in many ways, but I can think of some fun things. When he comes home and sees that you have done your very best to get the house in a romantic setting, you have made an efford to look your very best and have taken care of something tasty to eat and drink, I think you will have a fantastic evening."
What lingerie will make me look good? "The most common lingerie preferences of our clients is luxurious, black lingerie and stockings with suspenders. The escort ladies usually buy their lingerie at Pleasurements, where they sell special, luxury lingerie, sometimes with a naughty twist."
What are the ultimate tips of erotic professionals? "Pelvic floor muscles! Train them! Stronger pelvic floor muscles provide more pleasure during sex for him and her. The second tip is: just do it! There are things you need to think carefully about, but there are also situations where you just have to give it a try."